Draft of a children’s book. Written in 2016, currently unpublished.
Tails of Science
With Dr. Bailey, PhD (Pretty hungry Dog)
The Theory of Full
Page 1
Dr. Bailey is a brilliant scientist. She studies all the important things in the universe – why food tastes good, why more food is better than less food, and why eating is the best.
Page 2
But Dr. Bailey can’t do it all alone. She has help from her faithful lab assistant, Lab.
Lab finds science to be fascinating and delicious.
Page 3
One day, Dr. Bailey was reading the latest issue of Scientific Pomeranian magazine when she came across a shocking article. The article told the story of a young human boy would not finish his lunch because he was “full.”
“Gadzooks!” Dr. Bailey shouted.
“What is it?” asked Lab, who was still finishing the loaf of bread he found on the counter.
Page 4
“According to this article,” said Dr. Bailey, “There is something called ‘full’ that can happen after eating.”
“What is ‘full?’” asked Lab, still chewing.
Page 5
“It means not wanting to eat more food. Could it be possible to eat so much food that you don’t want to eat any more food?”
“Madness!” said Lab, now chewing on a bully stick.
“This theory flies in the face of everything dog science has come to understand,” Dr. Bailey said. “It seems completely preposterous. We must investigate!”
Page 6
“To the laboratory?” asked Lab?
“Yes!” said Dr. Bailey. “But first, to the cafeteria. It’s time for third lunch.”
Page 7
After Dr. Bailey and Lab enjoyed a delicious third lunch of saltines, tuna and chunks of banana, it was off to the laboratory to begin the experiments.
Page 8
Dr. Bailey and Lab conducted a dizzying number of scientific experiments on many, many samples of food. [Several panels of food being electrified, shaken in test tubes, run on centrifuges, etc.]
The experiments yielded no conclusive results, but did provide an excellent fourth lunch for Dr. Bailey and Lab.
Page 9
“What we need are test subjects,” announced Dr. Bailey. “That is the only way we will get to the bottom of this Theory of Full.”
Dr. Bailey and Lab posted a request for volunteers for their eating study. Curious and hungry dogs from miles around lined up to participate.
Page 10
Lab brought in the first subject, a Dalmatian.
“Let’s begin the experiment!” said Dr. Bailey
Lab placed a bowl of food in front of Millie. After she gobbled the food down, Lab refilled the bowl. After she gobbled that food down, he refilled the bowl again. This went on until the bag of food was empty.
Page 11
“Is there more?” Millie asked.
“No evidence of full there,” said Dr. Bailey. “Bring in the next subject!”
Page 12
Lab brought in another volunteer, a Golden Retriever. “My name is Harley,” he said. “I am really, really hungry.”
Lab set food down for Harley. The results were much the same as Millie’s, but Harley also tried eating the food bag when the food ran out.
“Not a bad idea,” Lab thought to himself.
Page 13
Lab and Dr. Bailey tried the same thing over and over with volunteer after volunteer. The results were the same each time. No test subject ever reported this mysterious feeling of “full.”
Page 14
After a long line of dog volunteers, Lab brought a little girl in for the test.
“Who do we have here?” Dr. Bailey asked.
“My name is Amelia,” said the volunteer. “And I would like a snack.”
Page 15
Dr. Bailey thought and puzzled and puzzled and thought. “A little girl, eh? A bit unorthodox, yes, but let’s proceed. Lab! Begin the experiment.”
Lab brought a plate of macaroni and cheese to the little girl, and she ate it. “More!” she said.
Page 16
Lab brought a bowl of apples to the little girl, and she ate those. “More!” she said.
Lab brought a basket of French fries to the little girl, and she ate most of those.
“Would you like some more?” Lab asked.
Page 17
Amelia thought and thought. She scratched her head and rubbed her belly.
“No, I don’t think I want any more,” Amelia said. “I am full.”
Dr. Bailey and Lab gasped. “WHAT!” Dr. Bailey exclaimed. “What did you say??”
“I am full,” Amelia repeated.
Page 18
“You don’t want any more food?” asked Lab.
“Nope,” she said.
Dr. Bailey smiled. “Do you know what this means, Lab?”
“It means that we get to eat the bananas we were going to give to the little girl?” Lab said.
Page 19
“It DOES mean that,” said Dr. Bailey, “But it also means we have just proven the Theory of Full! While we dogs may not get full from eating food, humans do!”
Dr. Bailey thanked the little girl and sent her on her way. Bailey and Lab ate those bananas and Dr. Bailey spent the rest of her night writing a paper to confirm her findings on the Theory of Full.
Page 20
The paper was a huge success. Dr. Bailey and Lab became the toast of the dog scientific community, which was great, because both of them really like toast.
To celebrate, Dr. Bailey and Lab munched on kibble, tuna, cheese, and all kinds of treats the rest of the day.
For a moment, Dr. Bailey thought she might have felt this mysterious sensation of “full” herself, but she quickly realized she was just a bit thirsty.
The End
